Please know that you can always come talk to me no matter what you need or what is going on or how well you know me. I am here for you, whether you need advice, someone to talk to, a place to rant, or just some reassuring. I am completely respectful of every problem or topic, and everything will be completely confidential. I want you to know that you’re not alone. 

Everything that I say that is in any way inspirational or advice-y is tagged with “Advice Maya,” so I’d start there if you’re looking for my words. Everything that makes me happy is on wizardpartyforever.tumblr.com.

Coping Methods (regular list)

1) Journalling.

I tend to avoid the triggering topic at hand. For a list of creative writing topics, see any of these links.  

2) Make a PostSecret if you can’t manage to write about a different topic. 

You don’t have to mail it in or show it to anybody. I keep mine in that manilla envelope in the stack of journals above.

3) Read.

I like books that are not too difficult that I’ve already read, especially as a young child. 

My favorites: 

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - J.K. Rowling

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone -J.K. Rowling

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King - J.R.R. Tolkein

Redwall- Brian Jacques

The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe- C.S. Lewis

Inkheart- Cornelia Funke

Nobody’s Princess- Esther Friesner

My Side of the Mountain- Jean Craighead George

The Thief Lord- Cornelia Funke

Paper Towns- John Green

I also try to be careful about reading the same book every time I need, just as I’m careful about using the same coping method every time, so that I avoid the book or the method itself becoming a trigger.

4) Write in or on your anti-trigger books. 

This might be pretty specific for me because I also have a habit of doing that when something really fantastic happens and I carry this book around everywhere, so it has a lot of happy memories. Same with RotK and Inkheart.

5) Fringe a piece of paper.

I trust myself with my tiny embroidery scissors almost all of the time because they’re pretty little things from my aunt, which, for some reason, works. 

6) Color something. 

I usually use an entire pack of colored pencils to color an entire sheet of paper, but markers in vertical or horizontal lines all across the page is nice too. 

7) Make a tape ball.

Pretty self-explanatory. It’s just a piece of tape all wound up on itself. You can add to it later if you want or keep them around as trophies if you manage alright. 

8) Ribbon strips. 

Step 1- Take five or six or ten or however many you want strips of colored ribbon in varying or the same lengths. Just get your hands on some ribbon. 

Step 2- Sew the ribbons together with a single stitch at the top or tie them all in a knot.

Step 3-Cut the base of the ribbon into fringes at least an inch or so long, longer if you would like.  These first three steps can be done on a random day; sometimes when I’m bored I spend whole afternoons prepping ribbon strips. 
Step 4-Tear the ribbons along all the fringes you’ve made, as far up along the ribbon as you can go. Tie knots in it. Wreck it as thoroughly as you can or want to. Double it up on itself in places. 

After that, I like to keep them in a box together, and sometimes I tie the different ones together. 

9) You can watch this video that I made a while back if you’d like. 

10) Drop a message in my ask or talk to your friends or text everyone in your phone or spam someone on Facebook or Tumblr with random words and quotes and pictures.

11) Alex Reads Twilight has also cheered me up immensely, and so has pretty much every Charlie  McDonnell video.

12) Move everything tempting. Get out Harry Potter. Get out some blankets and some pillows and some fluffy stuffed animals. Put up some posters in a corner with a light. Put the pillows and stuffed animals and blankets in the corner. Stack all the books you love around it until there’s just enough space for you. Read something you love, something you know so well that every page is familiar. Listen to music; something you love, preferably something with lyrics you know and can sing along to. Drink some tea or some hot chocolate or some lemonade. Sit in your corner, tucked away so that if you move, if you leave to SI, you mess up your entire fort. Stay there. Bring snacks. 

13) Listen to music that you love. I’m currently going for songs with words because it makes it harder for me to think of something else if I’m busy singing a song I know all the words to.

14) Read my happy blog and then make your own of happy thoughts and quotes and nice things people have said to or about you.

Coping Methods (triggered in school)

That is a really difficult situation to be in, balanced only by the fact that it’s hard to surreptitiously self-harm in an actual classroom and thusly it’s less likely that you’ll actually hurt yourself much. (Experience speaking, here- it’s still possible to SI in class because people are self-centered, but the actual results will probably be shallower, etc.) 

There are still some things you can do, though, both to avoid being triggered and to cope with the triggering! Here are some: 

If you feel comfortable enough with it, talk to your teacher some. You don’t have to tell em more than you want to, but just let em know that you aren’t comfortable with whatever the class is discussing. If you can explain, do. Your teachers really are on your side, no matter how distant from you they seem. Ask what options you have, and provide some yourself- maybe they’ll let you excuse yourself from class for a little while if you need, just a short trip to the bathroom or someplace you can breathe and calm yourself.

I know this is a really hard thing to do and you probably won’t be up for that. If you don’t want to talk to a teacher about it and you’re in a situation that allows for it, do take a minute if you need one. Step outside of the class for a little bit, sign out to use the bathroom, walk around and give yourself some time. 

As far as coping goes:

-Wear long sleeves, tights, long pants, whatever. If there isn’t somewhere obvious and hide-able for you to SI, you’ll probably be less likely to. 

-Find something to do with your hands. Rubbing a worry stone or twiddling your thumbs or twisting a bracelet or rubber band or tapping your fingers against your desk or doodling or whatever, as long as it keeps your fingers busy. 

-Think of what coping methods you usually use, and act upon them in whatever ways you can.

For example, since one of my methods is to cut paper into strips, I’ll tear away at the edges of a piece of blank notebook paper.

Another thing I do is write, anything and everything, so I’ll write song lyrics on my plan book.

My most invaluable thing is to listen to music, so in class or in a place where I can’t do that, so I will write song lyrics or just the title of the song, and then think-sing that song in my head. If you flip through my notebooks, there are titles of songs that keep me sane all over them- “Nerdfighteria Island,” “Amy’s Theme,” etc., and whenever I see them, I focus on the song. 

-Even if you’re not comfortable with talking to a teacher, maybe communicate what’s going on to a friend who sits by you or is in your class. That way you will have someone watching you and helping you on an immediate level. When I’m close to self-harming, one of the things that helps me most is just being in physical contact with someone- just a shoe-toe to a shoe-toe or a brush of fingertips. Just knowing you have someone who’s there for you might be a big help.